Bleah...Monday

So. Monday. I never could get the hang of Mondays. Even the fact that I no longer get up and head into work has not released me from the malaise and disinterest that seem to go along with "Day After Football" day.

This particular Monday, though, has some very special soul-crushing components attached to it. For example:

1. The Time Change: I really, really, really hate this time change. There is nothing worse than waking up at what feels like 5 and discovering it is only 4 AM. Or, worse yet, falling asleep at my desk and discovering it is only 8:30 PM. Whoever decided this time change was a great idea should have all their body hair removed with duct tape.

2. The Elections: Oh, God, please make it stop. I've done my job, Lor and I went and exercised our democratic duty last week, now can this just be over? I have never been impressed with our political system, but this election season has made me feel like I am constantly covered in slime. No amount of bathing will remove this hideous residue.

3. Weight Loss: Or lack thereof. Despite the fact that I know that everything is moving along as planned, I feel as though everything has slowed to a crawl. I have been dropping no more than a pound a week for almost 2 months now. I had originally hoped to be around 200 pounds by the end of the year. Now, it is looking more like that number will arrive around my birthday. Which is next June.

Hopefully heading back up to the gym today will revitalize the system. Right this minute I am ready to go back to bed to try again tomorrow.

Never Thought I Would Look Forward To Election Day,

- Hawkwind

One...Last...Day

So, let's give it up for protein shakes: they have single-handedly kept me from suffering the effects of malnutrition for the last 4 weeks + 2 days.

(/Golfclap)

Now that that's out of the way, let's have a chat about tomorrow, shall we?

I finally go in for my 2-week post-op exam tomorrow, the one that allows me to reintroduce "soft foods" into my diet. I quiver with antici-pation. (Either you get it, or you don't.)  I never in my life would have believed that I could be this excited about the theoretical concept of eating a scrambled egg.

Lor's recovery was a bit different - she really did not feel she had "arrived" until 4 weeks out from surgery, where she was able to return to a diet of normal foods. For her, a trip to Trader Joe's where she bought the next week's worth of real food was her finish line. (Of course, she is still working on eating that week's worth of food, 4 weeks later. Adjustment to new portion size comes slowly.)

Somehow, for me, tomorrow feels like it will be a major accomplishment. Maybe because my tastes are a little broader than Lor's, or maybe I am just more desperate than she was. She spent her two weeks of soft foods living on refried beans and frittatas. Those will also be a part of my diet, of course, but I am really looking forward to so many other soft foods:

• Mashed potatoes (not normally part of the bariatric diet, but perfectly legal for the next two weeks.)
• Creamy Peanut Butter (OMG, peanut butter, how I have missed you.)
• Soups and Chowders (Clam Chowder, here I come!)
• Canned seafood, like tuna and salmon. (Yum!) Even canned chicken is legal, though I have always thought canned chicken smells like cat food, so I am less excited about it.
• Vegetables and fruits, reduced to the consistency of applesauce. So, baby food, essentially. But I can totally get behind some mashed bananas and pureed nectarines. Pureed broccoli or asparagus - maybe not so much.
• And, the big one for me, soft cheeses. I will learn to eat cottage cheese, but I already love ricotta on just about anything. Protein boost + taste - what is not to like?

I am not sure if things like egg salad or guacamole are legal, but I will be asking about them tomorrow for sure.

The other BIG re-addition to the diet? Spices! I can start using mustards, mayonnaise, peppers, salt, cayenne, hot sauce...you get the picture. Finally, tasting my food will return to my life even if crunch isn't due for another couple of weeks. I am definitely at the point now where it doesn't even matter which protein shake I get out of the fridge - they all taste pretty much the same anymore.

Now, as to the protein shake diet around the surgery, I have to say this: it works. The day I began the liquid diet I weighed 261 pounds. Yesterday I weighed in at 241.

20 pounds in 4 weeks works out to losing 5 pounds a week. Those numbers are nothing to take lightly. So, despite my threats to eat the dog, and desire to gnaw my own arm off, it was worth it in the long run. Thank goodness. I would hate to have gone through this and gained weight.

The Dog Would Have Been Too Stringy Anyway,

- Hawkwind

400 miles and 50 pounds

Photo Credit: Snap Man via Compfight cc

During the final 2 weeks before gastric surgery, you are supposed to be gentle with yourself. Your liquid diet leaves you operating under a pretty severe caloric restriction, having to be careful to maintain your 60 grams of protein (to avoid malnutrition) and 64 ounces of water a day (to avoid dehydration) to make sure you do not damage yourself while undergoing the crash weight-loss that will reduce the size of your liver, giving your surgeon more room to operate. Caution is key.

So, in the name of caution, we have now driven 450 miles to engage in 3 days worth of household moving for a friend of ours. Not just to anywhere - to Tucson, Arizona, where it is so hot that you can literally fry an egg on a manhole cover. (Look it up - it is on YouTube.) 

Today is actually not that bad, so far. A rainstorm showed up last night and brought the previously miserable heat down to a tolerable temperature. And, as a reward for my interstate moving efforts, I had a surprise waiting for me this morning.

Today, I am finally down 50 pounds.

I had actually not expected to hit this marker until next week sometime, after I leave the hospital. (7 days to go!) But, it turns out driving and then moving heavy objects around are fairly significant calorie burners. Who knew? Accordingly, I have arrived at the half-century mark a full week earlier than I expected.

I want to be able to minimize it, and blow it off as no great accomplishment, but that isn't really how I feel about it. It is a major accomplishment, and an excellent start on where I eventually want to wind up. This is not part of a post-surgical honeymoon period. Getting this far required work, and sacrifice, and a whole lot of discomfort, It is the hardest thing I have done since I developed Epilepsy, and it is probably right up there in my personal list of "hardest things ever done." I am proud that I have made it this far - it encourages me to believe that I will be able to maintain this focus and discipline after my surgery and for the rest of my life. After all, after next Monday I will have the tool of the Sleeve to assist me.

I know that many of you that follow the blog have questions about your own weight loss. But the fact is simple - if I can do this, anyone can. There is no reason for anyone to remain shackled to obesity - whether by making lifestyle changes, or by the more extreme measure of going through surgery to support those changes. You, too, can do this.

The household is waking up around me, so it is time to get back to moving heavy objects. I hope the heat does not descend today like yesterday - it was like working in an oven.

Praying For Rain,

- Hawkwind 

Slow And Steady Wins The Race

Photo Credit: Antonio Ciriello via Compfight cc

It is a story most of us heard growing up. The slow and patient turtle wins a race against the quick and agile bunny by virtue of putting his head down and continuing to keep moving while the bunny screws off doing a multitude of things that are not related to winning the race. While I always questioned why the bunny didn't finish the race first and then go amuse himself, the example holds true even today, in our pursuit of long-term weight loss.

Consider this: this is not my first rodeo when it comes to trying to lose weight. I have tried Weight Watchers, Nutrisystem, Atkins and a version of Paleo (back when it was still called "The Caveman Diet".) I was always able to lose 10 - 20 pounds fast. After that: nothing. I would then embrace my guiding philosophy: "If at first you don't succeed, quit." Needless to say, the weight instantly returned.

Now, making dietary and lifestyle changes in preparation for bariatric surgery, we have had more success that ever before, mainly due to the slower speed of our weight loss. Lor's sudden weight loss spike since her surgery notwithstanding, we have actually been  maintaining a pretty decent rate of "healthy body recovery" (also known as "weight loss".) It has been 22 weeks since we started this process with my terrifying discovery that I weighed over 300 pounds back on February 2. As I mentioned yesterday, as of this week we have collectively lost 100 pounds. Do a little math (something like 100 divided by 22 weeks then further divided by 2 people) and it turns out that we have been losing, on average 2.27 pounds a week. According to the CDC, this number falls right into the "healthy weight loss" category.

Other demonstrations of "slow and steady" progress? Back in February, it took me around 25 minutes to walk .44 miles a day (the exact mileage of walking the dog around the block one time.) This would leave me covered in sweat, gasping for air, and exhausted for the rest of the evening. Today, in 45 minutes, I can cover 2 miles. The runners among you may be chuckling at this mile every 22 minutes speed, but remember:  back in February I was managing the brisk pace of 1.05 miles per hour. 4 months later I am almost up to average human walking speed of 3 miles an hour. As far as the 45 minutes goes - that is as far as Vixen's furry little legs will take her. We have discussed, once Lor is back in fighting trim, hauling the dog once around the block, then dropping her off at the house and walking another 45 minutes or so, to get in a full hour of walking a day.

Our walking speed should also increase from not having to stop while Vixen sniffs every bush, bag, and foreign object that looks like it might be edible.

Even Misdirected is showing the results of slow and steady. Maintaining a posting schedule of 4 posts a week, every week, we have grown from about 20 occasional readers to almost 50 daily readers. We will occasionally have really big spikes (like the day of Lor's surgery), but nearly 50 people are checking in on a daily basis to see what is happening here. This is with no marketing as such - any readership increases are coming strictly by word of mouth, people sharing the fact that there is some dude talking about he and his wife going through bariatric surgery.

Patience has not been my strong point over the years. But, maybe, learning to re-adjust to a changing body and diet is what it takes to learn to wait for other positive changes in life. Maybe this is a sign of developing maturity and spiritual awareness?

Nah. I still hate driving in the slow lane.

At Least I Passed That Lazy Bunny,

- Hawkwind 

The Century Mark

I have said many times within the pages of Misdirected that weight is not important to Lor and I. That it is only a number, that the importance of weight loss comes from improved health, enhanced mobility and energy, and a better quality of life.

Please allow me to step away from that well-reasoned thinking for a moment, to make an announcement.

Ahem.

"100 FREAKING POUNDS!!!!"

You read that right - as a couple, Lor and I have lost one hundred pounds as of our weigh-in today.

When we began this process, added together, our total weight was over 550 pounds. No wonder our bed creaked at night, even lying perfectly still. We were carrying the weight of an extra (tall) adult male between the two of us.

Lor's weight loss was already remarkable, even before the surgery. Since the surgery, she managed to average an additional pound of weight loss a day. I, of course, had a bit of a step back last week, but reclaimed that weight and lost another pound on top of that in the last week. 

Our Nutritionist warned us that those who lose quite a bit of weight before surgery might experience a dramatic slow-down in weight loss post-surgery. But, even if that should occur, I am already within 10 pounds of my original goal of losing "around 50 pounds". Lor has not needed a single dose of insulin since leaving the hospital. I feel better than I have in years. Lor will too, once the holes in her stomach finish healing up and she can re-graduate back to soft foods. (I have never seen a person crave refried beans more.) She has already gained back her mobility, and just needs to start working on her stamina.

I am not sure what to expect from here, honestly. Another 100 pounds of joint weight loss would put us into uncharted waters - Lor would weigh right around what she weighed at 17 years old. I would be somewhere in the neighborhood of 200 pounds. I have never been at a stable weight of 200 pounds, having gone from around 160 to 225 somewhere in my early twenties, the weight arriving as I also grew about 4 inches taller. (Can you say late bloomer?)

Lor and I make sure to keep telling each other: "Now comes the hard part." Losing weight has never been an issue for either of us. Keeping the weight off - now that is where the rubber meets the road. But we have each other to keep us both honest, to enforce workouts, to police one another's dietary habits. Unless we collectively decide to give up on this, I have faith in our success.

Wishing I Could Hug Lor Without Injuring Her,

- Hawkwind

PS - 28 days till my surgery. Not that I am counting, or anything.

Keeping It Real

Photo Credit: mikederrico69 via Compfight cc

I find it really interesting that I get so much feedback off of my most depressing posts. Whether because of synergy or empathy, or just because the world is a really depressing place, folks talk about, comment on and send me emails about the really depressing stuff happening as part of the Great WLS Experiment. (My readership even goes up by about 25% for these posts. Odd, that.)

I honestly am not trying to be a downer to everyone here with these less-than-cheerful posts. But, this is the experience as I am living it. To create the impression that I do not have doubts, or bad days, or serious problems with the whole thing would be totally dishonest. And it can be very easy to lose sight of victories for short periods of time when overwhelmed by details and defeats. But writing things down and sharing them with the Misdirected family is my way of identifying my issues and starting to work through them. It is as if I have a pool of talk therapists with several hundred people in it. Thanks for the great hourly rates, by the way!

Speaking of therapy, Lor came up with a solution to the whole psychiatric evaluation problem yesterday afternoon. Since our preferred provider is suddenly no longer accepting my insurance, we've just scheduled with an out-of-network provider. Seems simple, right? Cheapskate that I am, it never occurred to me that the problem could be solved by the application of money. But, the cost of a single evaluation when weighed against the total health benefits of the surgery doesn't work out to a whole lot.

I'll probably make the money back just in french fries I don't eat next year.

So, the evaluation is set up for next week, right after my 2nd dietary appointment. Wish me luck - I should have a surgery date by this time next week. I am back today to being excited about the concept - if I can be a little successful without the tools, imagine how much better I will be with the tools, right?

And thanks to everyone who reached out to me, concerned that I was jumping off the surgery train. I am very fortunate in that I am partnered up with someone who wasn't about to let that happen, and was ready to provide solutions to my issues. I hope I can be as supportive to Lor as she is with me.

Make sure you tune back in next week - we've got some exciting stuff coming up right around the corner. I can almost see my surgery date from here!

The Past Is Prologue,

- Hawkwind

Stand By Your (Wo)Man

Photo Credit: hugovk via Compfight cc

Our surgery dates are getting ever closer, and we are now at the point where we are ticking off days on the calendar before Lor's liquid diet begins. In about a week Lor will have her pre-surgical appointment, and I will have the appointment where my surgery gets scheduled. Tense times in this neck of the woods.

As we've gone through this whole process together, I've had the opportunity to really observe Lor's daily operations in a detail I had not ever been privy to before. The ins and outs of her daily life, her schedule, and her diet have left me with one overall impression.

Sometimes, it sucks to be a woman.

Take our weight loss journeys for example. Lor was chatting with a family member and mentioned how "unfair" it was that, while I have lost about 29 pounds so far, she had only lost about half of that. I mentioned that I started off at more than 30% heavier than her, so why wouldn't I lose more? And then promptly forgot about the matter.

But, during our most recent meeting with our nutritionist, I found out that this is a real, live issue. "Men lose faster than women, and in the places where bariatric patients want to lose,"she told us. "Women tend to lose weight in all the areas we don't want to lose in before we ever start reducing the areas that we want to lose weight from." She went on to talk about how important it was to not compare weight loss, that each journey was our own, etc. - but I had seen the flag of Female Solidarity being raised in that medical office. I was outnumbered and I kept my opinions to myself after that.

The fact remains that Lor has always had a healthier life than me. She has always wanted to eat fruits and vegetables while I wanted crap. She has always wanted to go outdoors and be active while I wanted to stay inside and play video games. The fact that she is having to go through this surgery to manage diabetes is manifestly unfair - but there you have it. Life isn't fair. If you are a woman, apparently less so.

Women are still 400% more likely to undergo bariatric surgery than men.This despite the fact that there are more obese men in this country than women. Sadly, many of these surgeries are not really motivated by health issues like mine and Lor's, but instead by self-esteem. The "beauty cult" in the U.S. tells women that they must be young, slim, and beautiful forever. Men, meanwhile, are free to pile on the pounds - because it represents success, or power, or something. And just spend a little time talking with any group of bariatric surgery survivors, and you will hear the horror stories of men trying to talk their ladies out of having surgery, of sabotaging their partner's weight loss, or even leaving their wives after surgery. Why? Fear of infidelity, mainly - these men believe that once their spouse has reclaimed some self-worth, she will leave them for someone better.

I say if your husband or boyfriend is that much of a prick, you should trade up. Bariatric surgery is hard enough without some insecure man stabbing you in the back at every turn.

A friend of ours was visiting the other day, providing moral support, and she and Lor began chatting about "female problems." With nothing to add, I decided to keep my own counsel. She finally looked over at me and attempted to bring me into the conversation. "What do you think?" she asked. 

I blurted out "I think I am glad I am not a woman," and I cringed the minute I said it, hearing how blatantly sexist and superior it sounded.

No one took any offense. Our friend just patted me on the shoulder and said "And you should, honey. You should."

Thinking I Dodged A Bullet,

- Hawkwind

The Story of the Ring(s)

The road to obesity is a gradual one - nobody wakes up one day and finds themselves 100 pounds heavier overnight. But, there are signposts along the road, telling us that things are getting more and more out of control. Despite the fact that I have a very poor memory, I will never forget a certain "signpost" day back in 1996. I was at my desk, typing away, and my left hand kept making the weirdest mistakes when typing. After half an hour of curse-worthy Backspace-ing and retyping, I decided to investigate. My keyboard seemed fine, there was nothing wrong with my software...then I realized that I couldn't feel the tip of my left index finger. The one where my wedding ring lived.

I had weighed right around 150 pounds when I got married in 1988, at 18 years old. I was tiny - at 5'5" I was only about an inch taller than Lor. But, in 1990, something weird happened: the growth spurt I should have gotten back when I was 13 finally arrived. By the end of the year, I was 5'8", and weighed in at almost 200 pounds. I was also pretty lazy and had just discovered beer, so the pounds just kept on coming. And now, at 26, I was so heavy that my wedding ring was cutting off circulation to my finger.

I spent several hours (I was a poorly supervised employee) trying to get the ring off my finger, but had no luck. No lubricant, no amount of time under the bathroom sink, no matter how I pulled and tugged, it stayed embedded between the rolls of fat on either side of it. Almost weeping in frustration, I took myself back to Shipping/Receiving, grabbed a pair of metal snips, and cut the ring off of my finger.

I was so disgusted with myself that I stopped wearing rings altogether. When our 25th anniversary rolled around, Lor and I chatted and made the mutual decision to get our "renewal" rings tattooed, so we wouldn't have to buy new rings. (Now THAT was fun, let me tell you.) I told anyone that asked that it was because I was a guitarist - that rings just didn't work for me. Not only was this a bald-faced lie (plenty of musicians wear rings), but I had also stopped playing back in 2005. I just didn't want to admit that I was unwilling to risk having to cut another ring off of myself.

Fast-forward a few years. In January of this year, I was helping my cousin, a world-class silversmith, with setting up his website at ShaneCasiasDesigns. Working with him gave me a chance to look over all his jewelry up close and personal, and I was totally mesmerized by one of his designs, a Crusader Ring:

Ring by Shane Casias, Photo by Rebecca Lowndes

I could not stop looking at it and playing with it, even while the two of us were supposed to be working. We successfully implemented and published the site after a couple of weeks of work, and I went back to sitting around the house, working on my blogs.

A couple of weeks after the site went live, a box arrived at the front door. As a "thank-you" gift, Shane had crafted me a Crusader ring of my own. $500 worth of custom jewelry, made just for me. I could barely stand the excitement as I unwrapped it and tried to put it on...

...and it didn't fit. The only finger I could get it on to was my right pinky, which made me look like a mob boss. Regretfully, I put it back into its black velvet case, telling myself I would mount it on a chain to wear as a necklace, knowing I never would.

On March 3 of this year, I had my first Bariatric appointment, having topped the scales at 302 pounds a month earlier. Lor and I began the slog toward long-term, permanent weight loss. One of the benefits of the pre-surgical diet is that you do lose some weight on it (which is the whole idea), and just for kicks and grins, after 10 weeks on the program, I decided to try the ring on again.

Guess which picture was taken by a pro.

And THAT, my friends, is worth no coffee, no sweets, and carb-counting till the cows come home. I may not feel like I am making any real progress, but I can slip that ring on my finger at any time to prove myself wrong.

Catch you all next week!

Considering A Skull Ring To Celebrate When I Hit 100 Pounds Down,

- Hawkwind

The Broken Regulator

Credit: New York Times

In my wanderings across the Internet yesterday, I came across a very interesting article on the New York Times website. It seems a study was performed for the Obesity Society Research Journal involving the cast of Season 8 of The Biggest Loser to determine long-term effects of "crash" weight loss programs. Perhaps unsurprisingly, each of the contestants, even the winner, suffered from setbacks and weight regain. What is interesting is the apparent reason for these setbacks: in each case, the contestant's resting metabolism shut way down, so their bodies were no longer burning the same amount of calories to lose weight as before their involvement with the show.

Now, the slowing of metabolism during high-speed weight loss is not a surprise to anyone: it is part of our defense mechanism against starvation. The interesting part is that these metabolisms never "re-regulated" - their bodies, it seems, were fighting to be returned to what had been their previous maximum weights. The metabolic system never got a grip on the fact that they were no longer "starving", and never came out of starvation self-defense mode.

Of course, this brought the whiners out of the woodwork across the 'Net. "Of course, they are broken. They went on Biggest Loser." was the main one I saw. Another favorite was "There is something wrong with this science. The Amount of Calories required by Body Weight - Amount of Calories Ingested = caloric excess or deficit. It is simple math." Yes, but the whole point of the study is that the equation is no longer working for these people that have gone through massive weight loss - even years later. And if you want to call these doctors "bad scientists": here is a link to the paper, published yesterday. Feel free to read it, then email me with whatever problems you found in their premises, methodology or conclusions.

This certainly would explain a phenomenon I have seen for years - I would go on a diet, work out, lose some weight. I would fall into bad habits and regain. But, the next time I tried to diet, reducing my caloric load no longer worked with the previous amount of calories. If I had once reduced to 1800, I now had to reduce to 1500 to see any results. And so on and so on. But, have one bad food day, and I would suddenly gain 5 pounds. It always felt like my body was working against me. According to the premise of this study, it totally was.

Now, buried in the details of the article is the following nugget: those of us who go through bariatric surgery seem to break this cycle - probably due to the radical revisions that take place when undergoing surgery. Here the body is no longer attempting to move the dial "up to 11" on hunger and metabolic function - instead, it is trying to make reduced demands due to the trauma of a large portion of our dietary tract being removed. However, once that healing process ends, it seems we get plugged right back into the same old "losing twice is 4 times as hard" cycle as the rest of the world. Falling back into bad habits post surgery could conceivably result in the ultimate regain of all our lost weight, even with the removal of 80% or more of our stomach. Danger, Will Robinson.

I strongly suggest you take a few minutes and go read the article. It can be a little discouraging, but it highlights one point that is super important to all of us: don't allow yourself to fall back into bad habits, or revisiting the weight loss mountain will only grow more difficult with each ascent.

I Suppose The Weight Loss Mountain Is Really A "Descent",

- Hawkwind

Not Statistically Significant

Sad to think I am hitting 285 pounds on the way DOWN.

Despite my dislike for "pounds lost" as the only factor of interest to many people who are going through the Gastric Sleeve, weekly logging is a required part of the whole process. And there was a whole lot of interest in what my numbers were for yesterday's weigh-in after my disaster of a week last week. But the numbers don't lie - yesterday I was at 285 again, representing a loss of 1.6 pounds from the previous week.

The odd thing is, I was at 285 and some change three weeks ago, too. Last week's weigh-in (without any major dietary disasters preceding it) I had gained a pound, and was up to 286! I was very disgusted with myself and happened to mention it to my father. Wise retired biologist that he is, he told me to dismiss the week's weight gain entirely: "Starting from over 300 pounds, son, 1 pound is about a third of a percent. It is not statistically significant."

I knew I should've paid more attention in biology class back in high school.

So, another not statistically significant weight loss for this week, then. Even my total weight loss since the start of this process is just on the edge of "real", with our diet changes having resulted in just over a 5% change in my weight since we started (285/302 = .943). Now, 17 pounds is nothing to sneeze at, admittedly - I have basically reduced the load on my body by the weight of a bowling ball or so. But my body still hurts, it is still really easy to re-injure my bad knee (they are both bad, but the one I had surgery on can go out at a moment's notice), and I look like crap. What once was a solid mass of fat all over my body has collapsed - I no longer look like I am carrying a beach ball under my shirt, I instead look like a candle that has been put in a hot oven for a few minutes. Not pretty.

It isn't all bad, of course. On Sunday, I was able to get into (and wear comfortably) a pair of 46-inch jeans that my mother-in-law bought me years ago, my first new jeans in years, and my first time in a 46-inch waistline since 2005 or so. I can now walk a whole mile without being ready to die. I even managed to get through 50 ounces of water yesterday, which may not sound like a mighty achievement to many of you, but my fellow bariatric patients are all nodding at the significance. Drinking that much fluid while only taking single sips at a time is amazingly difficult. Try it some day, if you are curious.  We should all be drinking 64 ounces a day anyway, right?

The struggle continues. This is the final week of relative calm, then the weeks of April 3 through the 23rd are filled with surgery-related appointments, 2 - 3 a week for 3 weeks straight. We are only 6 weeks out from Lor's final dietary consult at this point, where her surgery will be submitted to insurance, then scheduled. We do not have far to go here if we can just stay sane, keep encouraging each other, and keep moving forward. By Labor Day, this should all be over.

Well, except for the weight loss part.

Visualizing No Longer Shopping in Fatlandia,

- Hawkwind

Some feedback and questions

Since I have converted Misdirected over to talking about our upcoming weight-loss surgeries, the response has been tremendous. I've received comments, advice, feedback, emails, text messages, etc. all supportive of and enthusiastic about the changes here - and our visitor numbers show the difference. Apparently I have struck a nerve here, talking about obesity and "big-gun" surgical methods in dealing with it. A few questions have come up that I thought could be addressed to the rest of our readership, rather than just the initial questioner:

1. "So, is Misdirected no longer a gaming site?"

The short answer is no, we are not. I have added more followers and fielded more feedback in the last 2 weeks dealing with issues pertaining to weight loss than I did in the previous 3 years talking about gaming. Now, I am still a gamer, and it remains a major part of my life. Accordingly, I will (finally) commit to streaming 5 days a week, about 3-4 hours a day at my Twitch channel. I intend right now for this to take place from 2pm-ish to 6pm-ish (MST). Since Real Life Happens, I am not committing to which 5 days every week - could be Mon - Fri, could be something else.. Inaugural stream will be later today. I need an outlet for my gaming habit, and maintaining two different blogs just did not seem like an effective way to go. Thanks to everyone who was concerned about this.

2. "What the heck blender is that you are using?"

It is part of the Ninja Kitchen System 1100 package, the latest and greatest version of which can be found here:

The pricing on Amazon isn't quite as good as the older one we found on clearance, but still the best price around. The system itself is very nice - it includes both blender and food processor pitchers that can be used on a 1500-watt base. It creates very nice smoothies out of raw vegetables and fruits, with blend times under the magical 60 second mark. (Blending over 60 seconds begins to seriously impact the nutritional value of your raw materials, due to oxidation apparently. I am no scientist, and don't even play one on TV.)

3. "What are you doing for nutritional supplementation?"

Many well-meaning people have been concerned about the pre-surgery diet creating some major holes in our day-to-day nutrition. I may not have mentioned this in enough detail before, but the major reason that it is going to take us almost 4 months to get through the process is that first we have to go through 3 months worth of work with a real  nutritionist, with letters after her name and everything. The first month of the diet involves adding a daily multivitamin and reducing our previous meals to meals with less than 45 grams of Carbs and with 20 (or more) grams of protein with every serving. The carb reduction has not been much of a problem, but we've had a rocky road trying to get up to the required protein amounts, especially in our once-a-day smoothies. Our financial status has pretty much prevented us from spending tons of money on Whey Protein supplements or anything like that, so we have been making do with high-protein vegetables, greek yogurt, and adding PB2 (aka Powdered Peanut Butter) to our smoothies. A family member found out about this, and decided to give us a hand, and last night a box full of "Love and Peas" Protein-Rich Meal replacement showed up at our door, courtesy of June Baker at The Health ConneXion. We're very excited to try this stuff out - it has a whopping 20 grams of protein per serving, Dairy-free, lactose-free, gluten-free, Vegan-certified - I don't know what all that means, but Lor informs me that this is top-of the line stuff. Thanks, June!

Lastly, you will be seeing some changes to the site here as I tailor more towards our new arrivals - people who are wanting to hear about one person's journey from obesity to weight-loss surgery. I appreciate all the interest we have had here at Misdirected, and look forward to sharing my good, bad, and ugly experiences with you all!

In Transition,

- Hawkwind

Man Up And Eat Your Veggies

24 ounces of Spinachy Carroty Strawberryish Goodness

When Lor and I decided to start looking into more drastic weight loss solutions initially, she had me watch Joe Cross' excellent documentary "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead", chronicling his weight loss journey performing a 60-day "juice fast" and losing over 100 pounds in the process. While "juicing" didn't really sound like my thing, I had to agree with the tons of nutritional advice in the documentary focusing on one major dietary problem in our lives: instead of a diet made up of 33% (or so) Fruits and Vegetables, our diet was nearly entirely made up of meats and processed foods. We made the decision that, when we could afford it, we would get a juicer or a blender and start making the necessary changes in our diets. Oddly enough, we found a normally $200 blender/food processor combination in the Clearance section of our local mega-mart for 75% off within 48 hours of making this decision. Almost instantly, fruit and vegetable smoothies entered our daily diet, taking the place of our normal lunch routine.

Yesterday, given all the pet-centric chaos and commotion around here, we skipped our daily smoothies. Lor had some canned fruit, I had some leftovers from dinner the night before. I felt completely drained of energy by 8 last night, and woke up this morning with all the symptoms of a good, old-fashioned hangover. The lack of plant-based nutrients yesterday had me paying a serious price today. I told Lor this morning: "I should've just manned up and made our smoothies yesterday."

We both chuckled at the idea that "manning up" equated to eating plants. And I have been thinking about that laughter ever since. Why is it, I wonder, that we look at eating veggies as un-masculine? It can't really have anything to do with the work involved in raising plant-based foods: any farmer will tell you that farming is anything but a weakling's profession. It is work made up of days filled with long, arduous labor. We'll have to look elsewhere for where meat = man.

There is an inherently combative element to the idea of eating meat, I suppose - "Nature, red in tooth and claw", and all that. But talk to any professional athlete about the idea of eating an all-meat diet and you will be laughed out of the clubhouse. Whole, plant-based foods contain nearly all the nutrients a human needs to survive and thrive. (Some vitamins can be an exception.) What the heck is so manly about being nutrient-deficient?

But, the myth persists. We know a family where the wife attempted to start she and her husband on a daily regimen of plant-based smoothies, only to have the husband reject the idea. Why? Because it wasn't "real food". I, myself, have frequently mocked the people I know who prefer salads over steaks, calling them "tree-huggers", and saying they are eating "bunny food." Now, at 150 pounds overweight, I wish I had eaten more salads and otherwise kept my mouth shut.

There is nothing manly about gasping for air after a walk around the block. Embrace your inner bunny, and start making decisions based on what your body needs, instead of the foods that you think of as masculine. Your six-pack will never be visible if it is hidden beneath a beer keg, like mine.

Drinking My Lunch (And I Don't Mean Budweiser).

- Hawkwind